Conformed or Transformed?

The society you live in is full of rules and regulations. Some of those rules are written but the vast majority are unwritten and they relate to your culture, customs and values.

You’re taught from an early age that girls play with dolls, wear makeup and dresses. Boys that do those things are frowned upon and usually not accepted within the group. More often than not you conform because the consequences of being ridiculed and labelled are just too much to bear.

Society has a strong hidden agenda when it comes to keeping people in line to think and act in an acceptable way. This is where it gains and keeps its strength – through conformity.

Take some time to think about your life and how you’ve conformed to your culture, beliefs and values.
The question to ask yourself is whether conforming has helped or hurt you?

How many times have you kept quiet about what you really believe or feel for the sake of peace?
How many habits or thoughts do you keep hidden from sight because you know they will cause problems or labels in your life?

Conformity is another sign of a weak mental foundation.

If you conform then you are similar or in line with rules and regulations. That is fine when it comes to the basics of living in society like following the rules of the road. If you fail in that regard you will end up either in court or hospital.

What I’m talking about is the unwritten rules you follow that affect your inner values.
I’ve seen many unwritten rules disappear over the years as the new age of society takes hold.
Manners, common decency and courtesy seem to fade away with the older generation.
You might argue that women and men are equal; that there is no place for decency in the cut throat world of business; that nice guys do not win.

My question to you is who decided that these were the new truths to follow?

Society decided decades ago that manners and courtesy were very important if you were to be called a gentleman. Since then many things have changed in the unwritten laws of life. A sense of lawlessness and survival of the fittest prevails with people insulating themselves against the call of compassion.

Have you accepted these new unwritten rules into your values without any question?

The problem with conformity is twofold.
You conform and are accepted within your society.
Your inner values change with your balanced outlook.
This can lead to later illness and dissatisfaction within you.

Or you don’t conform.
You live with the consequences of rejection, career stagnation, labelling and being on the outskirts of civilisation. You are more at peace within you but you sacrifice being accepted in society.

More often than not you choose the first option because acceptance and understanding are the primary human comforts everyone seeks.

Are you a conformist?

These traits may reveal your status.

  • You talk like everyone around you.
    Your language and thoughts are similar, if not the same, as your friends and colleagues.
  • You believe and accept whatever the media/society puts before you.
    You don’t question or test the information you receive.
  • Your dress the same as everybody else.
    You want to be accepted by your group and follow whatever fashion trends are current from clothing to body art.

There is nothing wrong with conforming but when it takes control of your life without any resistance on your part, then you’ve a problem.

My next post will look at the art of transformation.

The average man is a conformist, accepting miseries and disasters with the stoicism of a cow standing in the rain. ~ Colin Wilson

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